Surviving the First Year – 4 Keys to Adjusting to Life with Triplets (or Any Multiples)

I can’t lie or even sugar-coat it – the first few months after the triplets were born were brutal. We were more tired and stressed than ever before, and it was a day-to-day struggle at times to keep the juggling act going. But, with a lot of help, and God’s saving grace, we did it. Here are some things we found helpful.

1. Learn to accept help when it’s offered 

I have never been one to readily ask for help and have generally been very independent. Another triplet parent told me this tip before the girls were born. I let it go in one ear and out the other, thinking we would be fine, we wouldn’t need help. Ha! Boy was I wrong! It took a village! Literally. We had many relatives and close friends offer their time and help, thank God. We made a schedule for shifts and filled in our helpers. I was very concerned about the girls getting exposed to illnesses, so we had rules that helped minimize risk of the girls getting sick. We couldn’t have prevented the girls going to the NICU after being born early, but I was determined to do everything I possibly could to keep them from going back to the hospital. We asked that no one who had been sick in the past week come over, everyone took off their shoes (or used shoe covers) and was instructed on thorough and correct hand washing, etc. 

Accept offers of food and meals. A good friend of ours offered to set up a meal train and so many kind-hearted family and friends sent gift cards and dropped off food. I will forever be grateful for our village of helpers, especially during those first few months.

2. Schedule is key (as is a good log book)

While no one wants their baby to be in the NICU, it was extremely helpful getting the girls started on a schedule. The girls were what they called “feeders and growers” – there to gain weight and be sure everyone could maintain their body temps on their own. Fortunately, no one required additional medical intervention. We were extremely blessed.

While in the NICU, the amazing nurses and staff had them on a strict schedule eating every three hours, allotting each 30 minutes. Diaper changes before feeding. For example, R ate at 12pm, then Q at 12:30pm, then G at 1pm. We maintained this schedule super vigilantly. While sometimes things happened and threw us off a bit, we stuck to this like glue. It kept things running smoothly. Gradually the girls spread out their feedings and we adjusted accordingly. But, a strict schedule kept us on track and prevented us from completely losing our minds.

There was a log book I was given as a gift called “Triple Time”. It seemed so simple – a three columned table to mark down when and how much each one ate, when each one had diaper (including which type, #1 or #2), and if any meds or other things given. With one baby, we could remember things quite easily. With three, however, combined with little sleep and having many helpers in and out of the house, it was entirely too easy to forget or not even know who had done what. This way we knew and could easily look back – hmm, this baby seems constipated, when did she last poop? The book also helped us to be sure each one received food/medicine/etc, and one didn’t receive something twice. 

3. Color coding

We color coded the girls and continue to do so. R is red or rose pink. Q is turquoise or aqua. G is grape or green. This has been more helpful than words can explain! It kept track of pacifiers.  We can look back at pictures and know who is who based on the color pacifier they have or the color seat they were in. Now, in preschool, they wear bows of their color so their teachers and classmates know who is who. Not all things come in each color, and sometimes someone gets a default color, but for the most part, we can usually make his work. And, luckily, they each like their respective colors still.

4. Helpful products: Bottle pitcher, rock and play, white noise machine, and more 

Disclaimer: I am not affiliated with any of these companies, nor have I received any money or products from them. I mention these things specifically because we, personally, found them helpful. There may be, and likely are, similar alternatives available.

We had a bottle pitcher (#DrBrowns) that we used to make up bottles for the next day. Having them made and ready to go (we heated them in warm water, putting them thru twice) for the entire next day was key. We were able to make large batches in the picture and pour them into the bottles.

The Orbit name labels were helpful and still are! We put them around the day’s bottles. We still use them on sippy cups, etc. They are easily washed in the dishwasher and have held up incredibly well.

White noise machines. Life savers! The triplets’ room is directly across the hallway from our son’s room. He was not quite 2 and half when they were born. I was terrified of the girls waking him up and vice versa – I wasn’t sure if we would all ever sleep through an entire night again! We did, rest assured. White noise machines are amazing! We have 6 in our house and still use them nightly and during nap time. We found simple ones for approximately $25-30 on Amazon. They have all held up well and we have no complaints. We even found that we sleep better ourselves with them on.

The playschool rock and play sleepers were also life savers. We had one for each of them, and they all seemed very happy and content with them. The girls all initially had issues with reflux, and these sleepers had them propped at a helpful angle. We had the kind that plugged in and rocked them. We had to replace one that broke down, but as much as we used them, at least one was bound to breakdown. No complaints, these were fantastic.

If you are currently in the trenches of the first months/year with multiples (or even with one) – keep going! You can do it, and it does get easier! Surround yourself with positive and encouraging and helpful people. Keep fighting the good fight. You may not be able to remember the first several months, but one day you will all enjoy looking back at pictures together. Take it one day at a time and enjoy the moments you can.